Church of the Weak

Hehe.

Not New Guy (aka Patrick Dempsey) and I were out meandering on this beautiful Sunday, and as is the norm when we meander, he drove while I took in the sights. We came upon a sign in front of a restaurant touting the "Church of the Week"....I read it aloud and NNG said "W-e-e-k or w-e-a-k? Because I'd go to that one." Cracked me up. Because I'd be right there with him.

In other news, Lola has had a haircut. I have to keep it short because she's such a spaz, and it gets tangly and matted and she won't let me brush her. She was in such need of a trim, and I called every place in town for an appointment, and everyone was booked through July! (What's up with that, anyway? Is it pet pageant season or something?) I should have had a clue when I called The Pampered Poodle, and they were able to get her in right away. Pampered? Not so sure about that.




(Um, sorry that's so big. BAM! But I'm re-sizing illiterate. Deal.)

Anyway. Check out her BANGS. Yeah, it's like that. So, when The Pampered Poodle told me their fee, which was roughly half of what I'm used to paying, I thought I was getting a deal, right? How was I supposed to know that their pet stylists weren't "union"? So she has some bangs. She works those bangs! She owns the bang! She's Lola!

Until this weekend. NNG renamed her MOE-LA. As in Larry, Curly and MOE. He said it looks like they put a ramekin on her little head and used that as their guide. He says they should give that haircut a name, like the "Dorothy Hamill" or the "Rachel"....he says that they should call it the "Special Olympics". That Moela should model for the poster on the door that says "Get Your MOE Here!"

Fucking Moela. All she needs is a little product, maybe a fauxhawk...or a little doggie weave or something. Moela. LOL...

A Little Bit of Everything and a Whole Lotta Nothing

Hi, bitches.

First, let me just tell you that right now, I'm obsessed with Popsicles. In fact, I'm typing with one in my hand right now, because my lips are nearly frozen, and this must be a little what Botox feels like. (Which is good practice for my golden years, let me assure you.) At first I tried the sugar free ones, but as any of you who have tried many sugar free products can attest....they taste good, but there are other "effects" that shall remain unnamed. Suffice it to say, sugar free blows. I'll risk the diabetic coma, thank you very much. Popsicles = Heaven.

Anyway.

There is some stuff going on at work that I don't really want to talk about just yet, until it's set in stone. It's a very good thing! There is another little step up the ladder on the horizon, but it will be a few months before anything happens. (Thank God. I was beginning to wonder when I'd be able to stop sleeping my way to the top.) I'm so excited! Keep your fingers crossed, if you don't mind, because if all goes as I'm told it will, then it will be exactly what I want and need right now. And even though I said I wasn't going to be scheduling any more trips this summer, I will at some point have to go to Rapid City, South Dakota for a new manager training. South Dakota?! I'm really starting to wonder where all the trainers out west have disappeared to. I've noticed recently that I've had a reader from Rapid City, but I don't know what that is. Hey, Rapid City Reader! Could you email me and let me know what's great about your city so I can make a little plan? Thanks! (LBW5114 at yahoo dot com)

*pause here for Popsicle break*

I'm having an "issue" at work right now too --- one of my employees is fucking stealing and I can't prove it. It's CRAZY, I'm telling you! Whenever something happens, I ask her about it, she comes up with some sort of "explanation", and HR keeps telling me that without direct evidence, I can't fire her. And she KNOWS that we know, and things just continue to happen, and it's driving me nuts! Trust me, I'm on her trail. I just need an actual witness! She's part-time, though...so her hours are being cut to practically nothing. It's tough on the rest of us to pick up the slack, but I can't trust her to be there. I'm hoping the crazy bitch will just quit....or finally just royally fuck up so I can run her ass out!

Lola has been sick the last couple of days, so this morning we went to the vet. Turns out she has a little bit of a tummy virus, much like people get. Who knew, right? So she got some medicine and instructions for a bland diet, and then the vet gave me some special canned dog food for her. Uh, yeah, no. That's not going to be happening. Jenny Fabulous can tell you that I just can't do that. She used to bring her dog Kasey up on the weekends and feed him IN ANOTHER ROOM and I just about retched my guts out. I can't look at it, I for God's sake can't smell it. Ugh. No way. Normally Lola eats the lovely dry Iams puppy food and we can all live with that. So, tomorrow, when she's allowed to eat again, she will be getting a fabulously bland breakfast of white rice and boiled chicken. Fucking dog food. No. NO. *aack*

So, Not New Guy was out of town last weekend, racing cars. Yeah, it's like that. You all know that I'm sort of private when it comes to him. There are reasons for that. At first it was because I wasn't sure how long I was planning on keeping him. *wink* Then it was because I was starting to have real feelings for him, and I didn't want to scare him off. And now, it's because I can finally reveal his true identity, but we'll have to keep it between us, ok? I've already told you that he races cars, so that's very sexy and cool. And he has a gorgeous head of hair. VERY sexy. Give up? Fine. Everyone...meet NNG:



Oh yeah. It's like that.